My mom is dying and I am trying to plan my wedding with the hopes that she will still be here for it. My mom also really wants the same thing. My sister, who is a maid of honor is fighting me on everything, ultimately because she is jealous that I will have our mom at my wedding and she wont. How can I make the wedding planning special for her so she stops ruining the big day for everyone?
I’m the maid of honor in my brother’s upcoming wedding, and I don’t really know the bride all that well. She just wanted to keep the wedding parties as family-only so none of her friends would feel put out. Well, the traditional MOH tasks are still falling on me – a woman who hardly knows the bride! (PS there was no turning the job down or the world would end).
At the moment, I’m trying to plan her wedding shower. The small and reasonable guest list has now jumped to over 40 people, very few of whom are actually close friend, and ten of whom aren’t even invited to the wedding!
Personally, I find it super tacky to a) throw over 40 people at me and expect me to finance this party, b) expect gifts from all the party members (even the ones not invited to the actual wedding), and c) invite ten people to a wedding shower -expecting gifts- while making it known that they are not getting a wedding invitation.
I tried to gently tell the bride that we should put a ”no gifts” notice on the invitations of those not coming to the wedding, but her mother got all huffy and insisted that this party was ”payback” for all the bridal showers, baby showers, etc. that the bride had ever gone to. She’d bought presents for those people, now it was their turn to buy presents for her.
While I don’t really want to argue with the bride, I find this beyond tacky and beyond rude. I also heard the bride say she wasn’t doing her wedding the ‘etiquette way’, she was doing it ‘her way’. I’m all for bending the rules, but…come on!
How would you feel if you were invited to the wedding shower of a woman you:
a) didn’t know that personally (say, you were on her softball team or were a distant coworker)?
and/or
b) didn’t receive a wedding invitation from?
Would you attend? If you attended, would you bring a gift? How would you feel about being expected to bring a gift as ‘payback’?
How should I handle this? I’ve made and addressed the 40 invitations as per the bride’s orders, but this isn’t sitting well with me. I don’t want this tacky party to be a reflection of ME.
There are no other bridesmaids. There’s me, and my 18 year old baby sister. She can hardly be expected to pay for anything – she is still in high school! My brother and his fiancee are in their mid-30′s, and still expected my parents to pay for their wedding (which is his second, I should add), host their showers, etc. The bride got a ,000 inheritance from her grandmother specifically to pay for a wedding – please explain to me how one cannot fit in this budget?
This is the kind of control freak woman I can’t stand, and none of this behavior started to manifest until after she had a ring on her finger. Blehhhhhhhhhhhh.
I am the maid of honor in a very small destination wedding (20ish people). The bride lives across the country and there isn’t a wedding party besides a maid of honor and best man. The wedding events are all planned out for most of the trip. What are my responsibilities as maid of honor? Also, what is an appropriate wedding gift?
i was at a wedding (im 14) and there was this guy (he was the male of honor with a 16 girl maid of honor) two years older than me looking across the room at me for the most part. he was dancing with his mom and looking at me a lot and when he had to dance with his partner (the maid of honor it would be short). when we had to stand in a line he decided to make an excuse and stand next to me. in addition when i was walking by he was staring at my legs. whenever the other men of honor were talking to him they would both look over at me.
today i was at the bride’s house and he was there. the bride asked me how old i was and i said 14 and everyone started oooing and the guy just smiled and raised an eyebrow at me. other than tht he looked over my way sometimes and smiled (at times). right after i left the house to go home he asked his parents to go home. (maybe its a coincidence?) btw ive never talked/ actually met the guy. our parents talked though
**BTW i added on fb him three weeks ago and he accepted but didnt message/chat me**
so i took the first step and asked him "hey wats up" on chat but he hasnt answered on been on chat for about a week now…did i creep him out or did he just do those things at the wedding to have fun….? (thats what my friend told me…)
yesterday i saw him at this store. he looked at me a bit but i dont really know for sure bc i completely ignored him. but his parents caught up him my dad and they started talking (and walking out) but as he walked he made sure he didnt look at me and walked at least a foot away from us. his mom just simply smiled at me and then my dad and i went our separate way to the car. I saw him again at a different store and we passed by each other and i looked straight ahead and he looked kinda off the side/down but we didnt talk bc i had to leave.
So there is this guy…? (should i even bother with him?)?
i was at a wedding (im 15) and there was this guy (he was the male of honor with a 17 girl maid of honor) two years older than me looking across the room at me for the most part. he was dancing with his mom and looking at me a lot and when he had to dance with his partner (the maid of honor it would be short). when we had to stand in a line he decided to make an excuse and stand next to me. in addition when i was walking by he was staring at my legs. whenever the other men of honor were talking to him they would both look over at me.
today i was at the bride’s house and he was there. the bride asked me how old i was and i said 15 and everyone started oooing and the guy just smiled and raised an eyebrow at me. other than tht he looked over my way sometimes and smiled (at times). right after i left the house to go home he asked his parents to go home. (maybe its a coincidence?) what does this mean? btw ive never talked/ actually met the guy. our parents talked though
i added him a week and a half ago on fb and he accepted but didnt message/chat me**
*what should i do….and is he interested?*
~Thanks a bunch!~
It’s my best friends wedding I’m the maid of honor they’re registered at Walmart and target. I don’t know what they need for their house so should I just give a gift certificate?
I am the maid of honor and have been asked for help by the bride. Due to family politics, a 3-year old girl will be in the ceremony against the bride’s will. She does not want flowers thrown, but doesn’t know what else to have the little girl do. The wedding is a Caribbean destination wedding on the beach. Any suggestions?
I don’t know. Personally, I find this tacky but I am trying to see it from all angles. I am a friend of the bride, I am NOT in the wedding, but invited to the wedding. It seems her wedding party has a lot of people in it, including maid of honor of course. I thought the maid of honor was to take care of these type of expenses and NOT EXPECT/FORCE guests to pay UP FRONT for a bachelorette party that they had NO HAND in planning. I could understand POSSIBLY asking the bridesmaids to chip in if she could not afford the party she has planned, but to then invite additional guests and expect them to have to pay as well, I just was not prepared for this and did not think it was customary, maybe I am wrong, I have been looking this up online and seen many different views but personally I find it bad etiquette.
For ME, the bride was/is a close friend of mine, I say "was" because we were very close friends for a few years then kind of lost touch and JUST got back in touch recently and JUST SAW each other for the first time IN MANY YEARS and she invited me to her wedding (Good timing for us to get back in touch as I am happy to be attending her wedding). She said she would have loved if I could have been a bridesmaid, it was "too late" and that was fine with me as this is kind OF SUDDEN for me and I have been a bridesmaid before and it COST ME A LOT OF MONEY (the dress, shoes, hair/makeup, engagement party gift, shower gift, wedding gift, etc. etc.).
The wedding was to be about 2 months after I saw her and she said she would be having a bachelorette party as well and wanted me to come, I said "of course". I have been to showers, birthdays, parties, weddings, everything but an actual bachelorette party so I figured it would probably be at someones house or at a club or bar and involve music, alcohol and a stripper. I also figured that it would cost me "something", that maybe it would include drinks or maybe not (I don’t drink much anyway so no big deal if I pay for my own alcohol), I also assumed that wherever the "venue" was that it would be already reserved and paid for by the MOH, and if not, if it was just a "girls night out" to a club, that it may involve an admission fee to a club, which I would pay my own way, just as I would any other night if I went out to a club with a cover charge.
What I DID NOT EXPECT was to find out AFTER THE FACT that the plan was to go to a venue which is about an hour and a half away, in an area that is not easily accessible by car, that tickets had to be purchased IN ADVANCE and ranged in price from to 6 depending on "how good of a package you wanted to buy" and the only difference really was the more you spent, you got either 1 to 4 "free drinks" and a "free picture" the fee includes NOTHING but admission. Also, there was to be a cost to ride in the limo which was already reserved and paid for, which had two additional EMPTY SEATS in it ANYWAY, but that’s besides the point. There would also be a "pre-party" where you are expected to bring a bottle of liquor (so I assume the limo will not have a bar in it) and the nature of this party requires a certain kind of dress, which then cost me more money to buy clothes and accessories (something I WILL NEVER WEAR AGAIN-picture something like a "costume party"). So, like I said, I find this all out just a few days before the party when the bride frantically calls me because I have not yet "purchased my ticket", I have to say, I was very turned off by this whole scenario but this is a FRIEND and I do not want to miss her party so I paid for the cheapest ticket and will also have to pay another or more to ride in one of those empty limo seats, and when I get there I will have to pay for any drinks I want-I may drink 2 or 3 drinks but in this place, the average drink is -. It is not even the type of party or venue I would EVER have chosen to go to, not sure how much I will even enjoy it. I don’t want to hold resentments about this but I just felt this was very tacky and did not expect to have to pay all this money just to attend someones party. I will be attending the wedding as well and now I am wondering if I need to bring extra money because when I get there, will I have to pay for my plate or my drinks? I have heard of cash bars at weddings but have never been to one. I am just wondering if this is the norm these days, it seems from what I read mostly, the MOH is supposed to pay for these expenses and the bridesmaids should chip in if necessary, but not any additional guests such as myself.
I guess I just figure if I were the MOH, I would have only accepted the responsibility if I could afford to, and if I could, I would not EXPECT people to pay for tickets and rides to get to the venue and to BRING LIQUOR TOO and pay all the REGULAR expenses once they get there (drinks). If I could not afford to pay for something like this, I would have it at my home, buy the liquor and hire some e
I am the maid of honor in my cousin’s wedding, and am responsible for throwing her a shower. Natually, I’ve also spent hundreds on dress/shoes/etc and in lieu of a bachelorette party, we will be taking her to a play (her request). I want to do whatever is the right thing, but considering the hundreds I’ve already spent, how much of a gift is likely expected or proper?
I’m going to be the Maid of Honor at my sister’s wedding. I don’t have very much money (I’m just a poor college student) and I’ve spent way more than I should of on her bridal shower and my dress and things like that. Is it necessary for me to buy them a wedding gift as well? She is pregnant, and I would feel kinda bad not getting her anything, so I was thinking of making an afghan for the new baby. Is it appropriate to give baby items as a wedding gift if the bride is pregnant? If not, can anyone recommend something I could make (sewing, knitting, or crochet)? Thanks so much!